After the election

I've been wanting to say something about the future and the economic and housing downturn for a while. But where to begin? And I feel the same way about my reaction to the election. I've been watching with great interest what other people have said about the election and the future. I've been excited to see so many different opinions, many mirroring my own thoughts, others thought provoking.

I've felt for a while that my life is basically threading water - working to support myself now and in the future, trying to help others by teaching, staying in touch with my parents, and wondering why God put me on this planet. I'm looking at the election as being the start of the second half of my life and it's my responsibility to use this point in time to figure out what next - what will give my life new meaning.

My thoughts aren't focused and I'm a little afraid of putting this arbitrary time line in place, but I want to make a difference - I want purpose. First thing is to try to start putting these thoughts down. I've chosen my most private blog to do this.

I was so disappointed that Sarah Palin was the first woman chosen to run on a national scale after Geraldine Ferraro. I sacrificed so much of my young adult life to be the "first" woman in so many venues - local, state, and national, to have someone who didn't "get it" represent women. My response to her comments after the election about women having to be twice as prepared as men, etc., confirmed she didn't get it. If she hasn't had to struggle with that already, then she's been extremely blessed.

Even Hillary Clinton didn't have to work as hard as those of us breaking glass ceiling in the 70's and 80's. She road on Bill's coattails for years and had a lot of access to money and power without having to be an administrative assistant (despite more education and smarts than her male bosses).

When Geraldine Ferraro ran for vice president in the 80's against Jesse Jackson running for president, I asked one of my black female students at the University of Illinois who she identified more with, a black or a woman? She chose the woman. I found that very telling and surprising,

I'm surprised that in the 20 plus years since then we haven't had a black or a woman get higher. I gave up. Exhausted being a role model, I chose a new career in which there are a lot women - real estate, and fewer leadership roles. We do have more women in the Senate. I do think society recognizes that women can be good workers, but it's still hard to have them accepted as leaders with the same standards that are used against men.

So I'm still sad about the role of women in leadership while rejoicing that we have elected a black.

I'm also sad that the job of president has bypassed by age group. A couple of older baby boomers have been president - Clinton & Bush, but they weren't a part of my generation. I graduated high school in 1970. Girls still had to wear dresses to school. The year after I graduated, they were allowed to wear pants. That was a dramatic change - something someone like Malcolm Gladwell should examine in how it changed my generation. Among other things, women were suddenly expected to work. Women five years older than me were allowed to work, but they weren't expected to at the detriment of their familly life. I loved that expectation, but the environment wasn't easy. Now we have Obama who is more than 10 years younger than me - he grew up in a very different environment for women in the workplace. I marvel that he could have been one of my students at the University of Illinois, if he had gone there. I still think of them as kids. And I was a kid (started at 26 years old) teaching them.

Well, I think that's enough of my sighs for today. I hope I continue to write so I can better formulate where I've been and where I want to go.

Flawed Hereos and Other Characters

I'm been catching up on a lot of new television shows lately, and I love the trend of having flawed good people where the character's flaw is not their downfall - so much more like real life. After hearing about the show "Mad Men" because it was nominated for so many Emmys, I watched a lot of last Sunday's marathon and recorded the rest. The era in the show is during the period I was growing up, just before I was a professional. It brings back so many memories - the clothes, the smoking, the drinking, the role of women, especially smart women, but that's probably another blog.

While there are a number of good flawed characters, the one who caught my attention is the new young, ambitious account executive who wants his boss's job. He tried to blackmail the boss into nominating him for the position, and it didn't work. Yet he wasn't fired, just put on notice. Isn't that more like real life?

In the same week, I saw an episode of "The Closer" in which one of Brenda's detectives, who is particularly overzealous about an old case, acts rude and obnoxious to anyone who doesn't take his side. He harasses the guy who served time for the crime and who is killed in this episode. And he delights in that man's murder and doesn't work very hard on the investigation. You expect the detective to be canned or put on suspension. But the more human response of his superiors is to question him and try to distance him from the more important aspects of the investigation, but to UNDERSTAND where he is coming from. Wouldn't that probably be the outcome in your workplace?

Immediately after "The Closer", Holly Hunter stars in the fascinating "Amazing Grace". I'm not sure what I think about her. She's definitely flawed, but boy, is she good and ethical with her job. And her best friend is wonderful - also a little rough around the edges, but good at her job and a dedicated friend and mother. The two friends had a run-in on these week's show about how long it took the friend to tell Grace her dog was missing. But the response was so human, anger at first and finally forgiveness and understanding. This one had a happy ending so you expect the forgiveness to hold. And that's the way I think it would be in real life as well.

Playing with kids

Yesterday, I was fortunate to have two invitations to New Years Day parties scheduled at different times, so I was able to make both. Both had good friends as hosts, Traci & Linda, an interesting assortment of people to talk to, and great food. But my real joy, and apparently a surprise to my office friends at the second party, was playing with the kids.

I pulled out my repertoire of kid songs to entertain and distract when the kids were getting a bit rambunctious. "In a Cabin in the Woods" probably tops the list. I remember when I was a babysitter, one of my frequent clients used to beg me to sing this "lullaby" to him every time I sat with him. It's also a song I use frequently when I'm showing houses to parents with small kids.

It's a great mystery to me why I never had my own kids. When I was a kid, I loved the movie "Cheaper By the Dozen" and planned to have 12 of my own and to run an orphanage. I guess I mistook the message from that movie, and rather than adopting a life with a lot of kids, I've adopted one with a lot of systems.

So one of my new systems for 2008 is try to spend a little time at least five days a week reflecting on the good in my life and posting it to my personal blog.

Learning to teach

I'm setting up a blog on Google so I can learn how to do it and then teach my manager how to do her own blog. That's her goal for her 70's. So here goes.